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„Warte kurz. Ich will dir noch was erzählen. Von einem Moment, in dem ich sehr traurig war. Willst du noch einen Schluck?“. Sie hält die Flasche am Hals fest und lässt sie hin und her schwingen, als wollte sie seine unschlüssigen Gedanken damit karikieren. Trip nickt. Sie schenkt ihm ein. Wieder ist das Glas randvoll. Ihres auch.
„Im Urlaub in Spanien habe ich damals Ramon kennen gelernt. Er war so alt wie ich, hatte aber schon jede Menge Erfahrungen gemacht. Ich hatte gar keine. Nicht ein Kuss, nichts. Und dann war da dieser Ramon und er war so cool.“ Trip sieht, dass Brittas Augen im Halbdunkel des leeren Cafes zu leuchten anfangen. Es ist fast mystisch.
„Nach ein paar Tagen habe ich dann auch kapiert, dass er etwas von mir will. Ich meine, kein Typ nimmt sich jeden Tag für ein Mädchen Zeit, nur um mit ihr Baden zu gehen oder Beachball zu spielen. Richtig? Das Blöde war nur, dass ich noch nicht soweit war. Echt nicht. Mein Busen war noch ganz winzig und mein Arsch völlig flach. Da war ich echt spät dran. Aber egal. Es gab Ramon und es gab die eine Chance für mich. Wenigstens wollte ich mich verlieben und einen Kuss mitnehmen. Und ich habe mich ganz schrecklich verliebt in den drei Tagen, die uns noch blieben. Natürlich wusste ich da noch nicht, wie weh das tun kann. Am letzten Abend haben wir uns geküsst. Es war herrlich! Nur gegen Ende hatte ich das Gefühl, dass Ramon mehr wollte und das wollte ich eben nicht. Wir haben uns trotzdem heiße Liebe versprochen und dass wir uns besuchen und all das.
Am nächsten Tag fuhr unser Bus zurück nach Deutschland. Er stand da und wir haben uns zum Abschied noch einmal geküsst. Mit pochendem Herzen bin ich als Letzte in den Bus gestiegen. Zisch und die Türen waren zu und schon waren wir auf der Autobahn.
Kaum waren wir zuhause angekommen, habe ich mich hingesetzt und Ramon einen Brief geschrieben. Völlig naiv natürlich. Ich würde ihn immer und über alles lieben und sobald ich könnte würde ich wieder zu ihm kommen und dann würden wir nachholen, was wir beim ersten Mal versäumt hatten, und so weiter. Außen auf den Umschlag habe ich zwölf rote Herzen gemalt, die von Norden nach Süden fliegen.
Zwei Wochen später kam seine Antwort. Es täte ihm leid, aber er hätte jemand anderen kennen gelernt und irgendwie sei er mehr der Typ für Romantik. Deshalb würde das mit uns beiden nicht funktionieren und das wäre doch nur ehrlich.
Klar war das ehrlich und es tat ehrlich weh. So weh, dass ich quasi von einem Tag auf den anderen aufgehört habe ein fröhliches Kind zu sein. Meine Eltern haben sich ernsthafte Sorgen gemacht und geahnt, was da in Spanien losgewesen war. Ich habe aber mit niemandem darüber gesprochen. Und soll ich dir was sagen: bis heute nicht. Du bist der Erste, dem ich das so erzählen kann.“
Dicke Tränen laufen über ihre Wangen und wie von selbst steht Trip auf, stellt sich hinter sie und umarmt sie mit seinen dünnen Armen. Seine Hände hängen blöde vor ihrem Busen herum. Er weiß nicht wohin damit. Sie verharren kurze Zeit in dieser absurden Position, dann steht Britta auf und schmiegt sich fest an ihn. Er bekommt eine Erektion, hofft dass sie das nicht merkt und hofft, dass sie es merkt. Sie küsst ihn und zum ersten Mal darf er ihre wohligen, weichen Lippen schmecken. Es raubt ihm fast den Verstand. Sie fährt mit ihrer Hand unter seinen Pullover und streichelt die nackte Haut seines Rückens. Gänsehaut. Trip ist jetzt sehr froh am Morgen geduscht zu haben. Er wagt es, ihre Brüste durch die Bluse hindurch zu streicheln. Sie kippt den Oberkörper leicht nach hinten, so kommt er besser ran. Irgendwann knöpft er ihren BH auf und ihre runden Dinger gehorchen der Schwerkraft. Trip gerät fast außer sich. Sie landen auf dem gekachelten Boden, nackt, geil und sprechen kein Wort. Sie führt sich seinen harten Schwanz ein und stöhnt leise. Das fühlt sich besser an, als er sich das mit ihr ausgemalt hat. Ihre Titten baumeln über ihm, die Warzen ganz hart und dunkel. Gierige Finger krallen sich in ihrem weichen Hintern fest. Dann kommt er viel zu schnell und er schämt sich. Trotzdem streichelt sie zärtlich sein Gesicht und flüstert: „Das war sehr, sehr gut.“ Jetzt möchte er auch weinen.
My thoughts on people differ from the great speakers of the subject, but at the same time they’re definitely equal, and my wants are definitely the same, because I believe that all people deserve better than what we currently have, so I will attempt to explain the concept of people from a perspective that will allow people to be free and happy–a perspective to allow people to gain what they want and so they will deserve exactly what they have. This concept may sound like you reap what you sow, and I believe that it is related, but this concept is to clear up any confusion about the people that inhabit Earth so we can reap eternally fruitful crops.
First, and according to this Equilibrium, humans, in there constant pursuit of happiness, are infinitely ignorant and infinitely intelligent at the same time. No one can say that he or she has learned it all, nor can anyone say that they have an inability to learn completely–we’re forever learning because of these two opposites coexisting, and the Equilibrium seems to be in tune with this truth.
We’re also adhering to this Equilibrium in a fashion according to our vessels, and this holds true in many different ways, because our minds fall under its idea, our body size, skin tone, and other features fall gracefully under the Equilibrium of People, and the idea of our soul, too, reigns peacefully within the Equilibrium’s infinite boundary.
As mentioned our mind is constantly learning, and this fits the Equilibrium’s law, having two opposites existing together and creating an ultimatum. Here, too, we have two opposites that seem to stand out, and that’s the tone of skin color, because we’ve been ignorant in calling people either black or white, because none of us are truly black and none of us are truly white except for in our heads. Physically and truthfully, people are all brown. Everyone is a different shade of brown so that we’re singular in being brown, but no one is a different color than another, just a different shade of the same brown. According to the Equilibrium, I believe there’s an idea of an infinitely dark brown being produced from one force, and on the other end there’s an equally infinite idea of light brown. These two infinites are impossible to reach so that there is really no black or white, but shades of brown from within the two ideas of dark brown and light brown. I believe that everyone is singular in their color brown and we have been oppressing, discriminating, and segregating people without the foundation of logical reason–we’ve been ignorant–because people are all the same color. So, to be racist or prejudice is to discriminate against yourself in a way, because there’s nothing that makes anyone any different than you considering we’re all human and wanting to be happy.
We were separated because we separated ourselves; we were racist because we were ignorant.
People also fall in line to the theory of the Equilibrium, because of hair, eyes, and lips to mention a few I’m aware of. It seems that, in general, the darker the brown, the darker and thicker the hair of the person is, and the lighter the brown, the lighter the hair color and finer the hair texture, because I see it every day even though there are light toned women and men with black hair. It seems like there are fewer dark haired, light toned people than there are light colored hair and light toned people–it’s as if they bleed into one another while upholding this generality. People who have lighter skin seem to have lighter colored eyes as a generality, too, and people with darker skin seem to have darker colored eyes. This, however, is by no means an ultimatum, because it’s possible for any combination of anything to happen–its rarity is what I’m trying to explain. It seems, too, and I don’t think I’m being prejudice, that the darker the skin tone, the fuller the lips and vice versa. There are also people with slanted eyes and people with round eyes and infinite spots to rest between a circular shape and a shape related to a flat plain. No one has perfectly circular eyes, and no one’s eyes stay completely shut, but they rest in between the two. I don’t know if skin tone affects eyes shape, but it’s apparent that all people have different eyes. I would argue that people are singular in every feature they possess.
There’s also the opposites of sex in human nature; there’s the man and then there’s the woman, but they’re no different outside of the reproductive parts of the vessel. A woman can do anything she wants to so long as she’s not held down, and so long as a man isn’t held down, he can, too. Women should be able to preach in church, teach in schools, lead the human race, and do anything that they want to do, both collectively and individually.
Why would anyone believe that the man is perfect, but not the woman? If Adam was made good, then why wouldn’t Eve be, and if they’re both the same–one in marriage–then what makes them any different besides the reproductive parts of their bodies when they’re on Earth and are useful for production.
On one end, people, as a generality, are more emotional if they’re a part of the woman’s sex, but are more analytical if they’re the man’s sex. However, both of these, again, bleed into one another so that it’s erroneous to say that all women are more emotional than analytical or that all men are more analytical than emotional, because there are analytical women, and there are emotional men, but again, I think it’s the rarity I’m trying to explain. Some women are more sociable than some men, but some men are more sociable than some women, but I would bet money that, as a generality, women are more sociable than men.
This can lead to prejudices, though, so we must be careful, because, again, there’s no difference in humans besides our differences. We are all different but the same. We’re singular in the unity of race.
If you begin to look at people in light of this new knowledge, you should be able to tell that you have some connection to everyone. Let us breathe in this freedom and become what we want to be. You see, “I am Me,” is a powerful statement, because one must become what he or she truly wants in order to be happy, and what you truly want, the “me” you create, isn’t going to be like anyone else, so we shouldn’t be prejudice against others, for how could we when we know that none are the same except all are the same–that we’re all individuals, but we’re all united as human. So, be free and choose not to categorize a group of people, whatever group you decide to imagine and create inside your head, because how could a mass of individuals become one, and why would you associate many different people with a single common category? This is prejudice, because even people that are united, for instance, Muslims believing in Islamic beliefs and practices all share a common belief, but it’s far fetched to say that all Muslims are the same despite geographical locations, influences, and learnings.
Drop this prejudice and allow individuals to collectively gather and produce fruit for the kingdom of Heaven.
Buna dimineata in primul rand,desi pentru mine va fi noapte buna!
E ceata in Bucuresti! Imi place ceata,v-am spus asta? Imi place ca nu te lasa sa te vezi tot,ca e rece ca mine,ca e uneori dureroasa si ca te invaluie si te tine numai pentru ea. E egoista cum am fost eu cu sentimentul iubirii,e egoista,da!Cum ar fi toate fenomenele ale naturii de mica tragedie de la ceata (dar de efect as adauga eu!) pana la taifunuri si uragane sa fie altruiste? Ar fi ceva zic eu! Atunci nu ar mai fi moarte psihica sau fizica,nu am sti unde incepe si unde se termina fatidicul ,am sti sa admiram sa iubim frumuseti ,sa le dam meritul pe care de altfel il au fara sa punem in centrul problemei propria persoana.Si atunci nu ar mai durea!
Trecand la alte probleme mai importante ajung la concluzia ca imi lipseste cu desavarsire o disciplina si ca spontaneitatea ma aduce in pragul dorintei de a vrea din ce in ce mai mult de la restul din jur fara sa dau de la mine mai nimic.Cine sunt eu sa cer daca nu dau? Eh si uite ca am gasit o questie la care m-am adaptat destul de bine in ziua de azi ca majoritatea cer fara sa dea!
Melodia saptamanii: Switchfoot- On Fire (click pe titlu sa o asculti)
Ce mai mancam: Telina rasa cu maioneza(face bine la potenta psihica,caci nu-i asa ce ar fi o femeie fara coaie psihice?)
Ce mai bem: Burn ,ceai negru,apa plata rece sa facem in gat si restul!
Ce mai citim: Moarte la Venetia(recomandata de un amic sa-i zic asa drag mie)
Ce mai facem: muncim cu drag si spor pentru patron:-)
Sex: 0 (barat as putea adauga eu) ,eh da ce conteaza asta cand e atata cicolata in lume ,nu? (nu-mi vine mai sunt asa de obosita psihic ca eu cred sincer ca as adormi acolo in timp ce ala s-ar cazni sa ma “resusciteze”:-) )
Picanterii despre mine : iesit la o a treia intalnire cu acest individ sa-i spunem ,eu personal il vad copil ,desi are aceeasi varsta ca si mine,azi planuita o intalnire cu fostul sot sa discutam amanunte despre “reimpacare spune el” eu raman pasiva la ce vrea el,nu ca nu mi-ar strica acum iarasi sa stau in puf fara sa ma chinui zi de zi cu niste dobitoci,insa stii vorba aia “ciorba reincalzita nu mai e buna!”,mi se phoote telefonul si ma apuca dracii,si imi e dor de “altceva”.
As the Olympics come upon us we have
heard much about surrounding
communities “gearing up” for the
anticipated influx of sex workers.
While our hearts go out to the real
victims of trafficking, many of us
who are in this work voluntarily are
proud of what we do and do not
appreciate being portrayed as
powerless victims.
What these slick anti-prostitution ad
campaigns fail to highlight is the
labor organizing going on in the sex
work industry and the fact that
what most continues to victimize
us is the legal system itself!
Mariko’s Trial
Come on out on October 22nd to show your support for sex worker activist and founder of SWOP LA, Mariko Passion. She will be in court to request an early termination of probation with a goal of dismissing her hearing. Mariko has chosen to represent herself “pro per” without the assistance of a lawyer. Here is why:
“I feel that only I can best represent to the court and the ruling judge how being on probation has affected my ability to find sustainable legal work and housing. By law, I can convert my remaining 1 year of probation into an estimated 3 days of county jail.” says Ms. Passion.
In 2008, Ms. Passion was lured into a vice sting operation setup off of Craigslist, arrested and jailed for a night in county jail. After fighting her prostitution charge for almost a year, she settled for 18 months of probation and a charge of “escorting without a license”.
Although she would have liked to pursue
fighting a not-guilty charge she was
obligated to fold due to lack of financial resources.
SWOP LA invites you to support Ms. Passion and learn for your own benefit about how a sex workers is treated in LA County regardless of having the privlidge of being a first offender, having founded a non profit, and possessing a Masters Degree!
Will the judge and court decide that Mariko needs 3 days in the slammer to teach her a lesson about the ills of prostitution or will he release her charges entirely?
Get a front row seat and support Mariko by attending her trial. Please call Ofelia at 1-877-776-2004 x606. Due to the confidential nature of the case description above, we only want compassionate supporters and will screen for such.
I find myself in a unique set of circumstances this week. I am terribly busy par usual which has made it difficult to write, but there is… a new distraction in my life. I’m not sure how I feel about it, need to work it through and I will. I just… need to get my feet under myself first. I need to take a little break in order to do that. Here is my promise. Today is Saturday the 10th of October. I will write on my own, work through this… new found wonderment in my life and in one week, October 17th, I will start to post again. I’ll explain this diversion of mine down the rabbit hole… as long as I am allowed.
Much love valiant readers.
Ok, not sure if this will be TMI for most people but I am going to talk a bit about my sex life, so don’t continue reading if u don’t want to…
Now I have talked about before how I don’t really “desire” my hubby in the way I am suppose to. There are times where I want to be with him and love him and everything but I still don’t desire and enjoy his physical body. I try, I really do. I try to clear my mind of everything and focus just on him and who he is and his touch and everything and how he loves me and really desires to be with me but it just doesn’t work for me.
I can only get off sand enjoy sex when I start imagining other things. Things like looking at other women, being with a woman, me being a guy with a woman, a girl going down on me (either as a guy or a girl), etc… His touch and sexual actions with me are not enough to arouse me and bring me to “it”. And when I don’t imagine those things, then sex is bland and somewhat lifeless and very very frustrating.
So to keep my hubby pleased and fulfilled, I give in to the fantasy in my head so that our coming together can happen and he doesn’t feel rejected. I mean we can’t just never have sex. I don’t want him to feel bad or feel unloved or never get his needs met or anything. And if I just laid there or didn’t make any noise of gratification or anything then he wouldn’t be able to enjoy it either.
What is a girl to do?
